Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Monday, November 07, 2005
RANT (Ahh)
I am so sick of shallow people. I think it may just be that I'm in an all-girls dorm in an almost-all girls school and there's so much estrogen that everybody's decided to get bitchy. I'm so sick of the girly-girls, although I'm more sick of the ones that rate the others on campus. They generally start with the women. Rating them, their personalities, clothes, hair, the way they walk talk flirt and belch. I hate it. But it's not just that they rate the girls. They move on...they rate the men too until there's nothing left but the skeleton.
The bones of who someone is. Bones tell no tales...they all look the same, for the most part. You can make tools out of bone and spear things.
We're adults now. This isn't high school. I didn't expect this from here. I thought that because I was going to a school that was "known for it's academic excellence" that I would be surrounded by other intellectuals looking to quench a thirst for thought. I assumed that because it was expensive, yet very good with scholarships, that most people would have earned their way in. I thought that I would be challenged and inspired everyday. I thought that it would mean my mind would be stretched to new levels, my imagination taking new strides and I thought I would find myself in the best place I could be.
I searched everywhere. There is no such place. I am the only one. I'm the only one who likes being a nerd. I'm the only one.
Maybe I'm just the only freshman like that. I've talked to some upperclassmen and they're not so bad. They're all off campus though. I need to figure out how to make friends off campus. I need to find a job off campus. That's the only way. Getting off campus as much as possible. Bleh. But I'm glad. I don't like people. I don't like people who say one thing and do another. I don't like people who act all nice and then turn out to be bitchy. Likewise, I don't like mean people who use their meanness as a defense mechanism. Be what you are!
I don't like people who act like they like you, then act like they don't give a rats. I don't like people who say they want to keep in touch but don't exchange emails. I don't like people who see things only their way, and not the way of everyone. I think it has to do with the money here. I think it has to do with everything. Should I stay or should I go now?
The bones of who someone is. Bones tell no tales...they all look the same, for the most part. You can make tools out of bone and spear things.
We're adults now. This isn't high school. I didn't expect this from here. I thought that because I was going to a school that was "known for it's academic excellence" that I would be surrounded by other intellectuals looking to quench a thirst for thought. I assumed that because it was expensive, yet very good with scholarships, that most people would have earned their way in. I thought that I would be challenged and inspired everyday. I thought that it would mean my mind would be stretched to new levels, my imagination taking new strides and I thought I would find myself in the best place I could be.
I searched everywhere. There is no such place. I am the only one. I'm the only one who likes being a nerd. I'm the only one.
Maybe I'm just the only freshman like that. I've talked to some upperclassmen and they're not so bad. They're all off campus though. I need to figure out how to make friends off campus. I need to find a job off campus. That's the only way. Getting off campus as much as possible. Bleh. But I'm glad. I don't like people. I don't like people who say one thing and do another. I don't like people who act all nice and then turn out to be bitchy. Likewise, I don't like mean people who use their meanness as a defense mechanism. Be what you are!
I don't like people who act like they like you, then act like they don't give a rats. I don't like people who say they want to keep in touch but don't exchange emails. I don't like people who see things only their way, and not the way of everyone. I think it has to do with the money here. I think it has to do with everything. Should I stay or should I go now?
Whenever shall we meet again
Whenever shall we meet again,
In thunder lightening or in rain
When the hurly-burly's done
When the battles lost or won.
The hurly burly is just beginning. I think. There hasn't been much hurly or burly in Minnesota, but we'll see what happens this winter. People think it is the apocalypse.
I thought on this a good long time. End of the world. That's kind of a bummer. It's so easy to get caught up in the who-is-the-antichrist-this-is-the-sign kind of people. So I was thinking...yes, of course it is the apocalypse! Then I was thinking...no...it won't be that obvious. And now...
I think...I'm going to participate. Not anticipate. That way, I won't be let down in the end if the world isn't ending, and if it is, well, we'll just see what happens. And we'll all meet again in the end. Whether it be the abrahamic apocalypse or Ragnarok or ... hmnn...
Those are the only apocalypse stories I'm familiar with.
I had this obsession with Norse mythology for a while. It's so interesting. I'm actually really intrigued with religions of different sorts.
And as for me...what about me, anyway? Heavy sigh. I don't know anymore. Sometimes I work so hard at something I begin to hate it a little. So I give myself breaks.
And then I hate it that I gave myself a break. Like this weekend. I slept. I lazed. I watched some TV. I allowed my mind to wander. I rolled down the ol' hill. I chased a few squirrels. Good times.
But I didn't study. I didn't even sing. And now...I'm a little overwhelmed again. Why did I not use my time more wisely? The squirrels, well, yes they're obnoxious. I hate how they just waddle around eating bits of cupcakes and stuff, getting much fatter than they should be. I suppose they need it for winter. It's fun to see them try to waddle up the tree though. They get about three feet up and then come back down. I saw a flying squirrel the other day. It was the highlight of my week.
It's November already. I miss everything about home. Yet, I'm beginning to really love it here. It isn't the people. I've managed to make enough friends to keep me sane but not enough to take up my time. Oh dear, this means I have to start another rant.
In thunder lightening or in rain
When the hurly-burly's done
When the battles lost or won.
The hurly burly is just beginning. I think. There hasn't been much hurly or burly in Minnesota, but we'll see what happens this winter. People think it is the apocalypse.
I thought on this a good long time. End of the world. That's kind of a bummer. It's so easy to get caught up in the who-is-the-antichrist-this-is-the-sign kind of people. So I was thinking...yes, of course it is the apocalypse! Then I was thinking...no...it won't be that obvious. And now...
I think...I'm going to participate. Not anticipate. That way, I won't be let down in the end if the world isn't ending, and if it is, well, we'll just see what happens. And we'll all meet again in the end. Whether it be the abrahamic apocalypse or Ragnarok or ... hmnn...
Those are the only apocalypse stories I'm familiar with.
I had this obsession with Norse mythology for a while. It's so interesting. I'm actually really intrigued with religions of different sorts.
And as for me...what about me, anyway? Heavy sigh. I don't know anymore. Sometimes I work so hard at something I begin to hate it a little. So I give myself breaks.
And then I hate it that I gave myself a break. Like this weekend. I slept. I lazed. I watched some TV. I allowed my mind to wander. I rolled down the ol' hill. I chased a few squirrels. Good times.
But I didn't study. I didn't even sing. And now...I'm a little overwhelmed again. Why did I not use my time more wisely? The squirrels, well, yes they're obnoxious. I hate how they just waddle around eating bits of cupcakes and stuff, getting much fatter than they should be. I suppose they need it for winter. It's fun to see them try to waddle up the tree though. They get about three feet up and then come back down. I saw a flying squirrel the other day. It was the highlight of my week.
It's November already. I miss everything about home. Yet, I'm beginning to really love it here. It isn't the people. I've managed to make enough friends to keep me sane but not enough to take up my time. Oh dear, this means I have to start another rant.
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